Homage to the Standardized Test

This is a tribute to the countless hours I have been preparing my students for the annual crapness that is known as testing. See original post here: Crazy Teachers


LeAnn Rimes' version:

My version:
Who’d-a guessed that some old tests
Could start a fire with a single cigarette
She wasn’t crazy, or insane
Just sick and tired of wonderin’ when things were gonna change
So she looked around
In every room
Found CRTs, they heard the boom
Well they called the cops
She didn’t run
They hauled her off in handcuffs and a tight bun

Crazy teachers, long hours and low pay
Keep their crazy hidden till the end of the school day
Oh no, God forgive em, they didn’t go to school for this
Oh no, crazy teachers are made by politicians

They tell the country we lack skills to teach –es
Borderline unqualified, stupid union beetch-es
They cheat and lie and then give more tests,
They don’t realize they just contribute to the mess

Crazy teachers, long hours and low pay
Keep their crazy hidden till the end of the school day
Oh no, God forgive em, they didn’t go to school for this
Crazy teachers are made by politicians

Some take to coffee, or alcohol
Some take it lying down and let the country maul
Their sweet disposition and selfless ways
But you can bet that it won’t always be that way
No you won’t see it when you meet ‘em
So be careful how you treat ‘em
She might look just like me...

Crazy teachers, long hours and low pay
Keep their crazy hidden till the end of the school day
Oh no, God forgive em, they didn’t go to school for this
Crazy teachers are made by politicians...